I Have Peace of Mind . . . So Now What?

Okay, so much for descriptions of where I am physically and geographically. You’ve got most of that. It’s raining today.

I feel at loose ends and bored. Okay, that’s not entirely peaceful. It’s a familiar feeling. I am not scared. I am not even lonely, although I’d love to have a traveling companion. I was invited to go along with someone I met here, but it didn’t feel right. Oh, and at least 3 men have accosted me and tried to start conversations with things like, “Can I buy you a drink?” That would be “no.”

I don’t have a plan, other than following whatever feels like it is Next. It would be nice to know what that is. I get little ideas, follow through or space out. 🙂  Etc. I have a little bit of money, but no job, no car, no home and don’t know anyone here.

If I could have 2 wishes right now, I’d ask for a sufficient flow of money and teaching work that I love . . . in or near Boulder. 3 wishes and I’d ask for a car, too.

I’ve already got peace of mind, which is what I used to ask for when thinking of wishes. If I think I’ve lost it, I know exactly where to find it. So, now what?

My horoscopes are hilariously to the point:

Jonathan Cainer, www.cainer.com:  

A car, a road, a destination. Gas in the tank. Time on your side. Just one thing. No key with which to start the engine. It doesn’t take much to turn an attractive scenario into an irritatingly unsatisfactory one. But then, thankfully, the reverse is also true. A dungeon, dank and dark. Malicious wardens. Vile food. Then, just one more thing. A lowered ladder, leading to an open window. The addition of this one hopeful factor totally changes the outlook. Even your biggest problem has a solution now.

Rob Brezsny, www.freewillastrology.com for Sagittarius, Sept 7:

An adventurer named Brian Walker has plans to climb aboard a homemade missile and launch himself 20 miles into the sky using a giant crossbow. According to Wired magazine, he has figured out all the angles, including how to descend, and will probably pull off the feat without killing himself. It so happens that you also have the potential to propel yourself higher, farther, and faster than maybe you’ve ever gone, though in a safer and more metaphorical way. What’s the closest symbolic analogue you have to a giant crossbow?

And last, but not least, Eric Francis, www.planetwaves.net:

Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 22)
You seem to have liberated yourself from the idea of success and have suddenly stumbled into the real thing. The things you say and the thoughts you think are particularly influential now, so chose every word and keep your mind tuned only to the intelligence and wisdom that comes only from kindness. Speaking of choosing, you would appear to have more opportunities than you can really handle, or than you want to. So you will need to be selective, but you do have friends who would benefit from opportunities you can pass along to them.

Steven reminded me that “All signs are self-painted.” True.

I have some good ideas, the Ann O’Johnson book, the resurrection charm, teaching, writing, etc. I need a business partner who can help me implement them in a way that makes money.

So, that’s another facet of this thing I call my life at the moment.



3 Responses to “I Have Peace of Mind . . . So Now What?”

  1. Kathleen Scheps Says:


    In reply to your comment of asking for a sufficient flow of money” for one wish, replace the word money with relationships. Thus, what you really want is a sufficient flow of relationships — according to Joan Sotkin.

    This weekend I was at a 2 hour workshop with Joan Sotkin, who has written the book “Build Your Money Muscles”. She said whenever we want to say something about money to replace it with the word relationships.

    Money represents the energy of the relationship and the way individuals handle moeny reflects how they deal with thier relationships with themselves and others.

    Apparent financial problems, then , are never about money and always about relationships. Feelings of financial insecurity, while appearing to be about money, may in fact represent a sense of disconnectedness from oneself and others, fear of being left alone, or some other relationship concern.

    As long as I’m on this topic, she goes on to say that “debt actually allows both the debtor and the endor to express hidden emotions. Debtors often harbor feelings of being controlled, trapped, indadequate, powerless or ashamed, while lenders, after advancing money to a debtor, can feel more potent and commanding than they do in other situations. Both debtors and lenders, feeling less alientated because of their financial bond, generally benefit from these relationships until they are able to find a more intimate means of emotional expression.”

    “Money can also be a medium through which people express their need for love. Individuals who were abused or neglected as children often act out their absence of love and nuturing through a history of insufficent funds, underearning, or requests to be rescued by family, friends, or credit card companies. Similarly, people who routinely lend money may be expressing the need to be loved, perceiving that their generosity will inspire fondness among borrowers.”

    She feels the primary reson for resistance to changing has to do with the “Identify Factor, an internal mechanism that proects a person’s concept of who they are and their place int he world. Moving to a new financial position, which can easily threaten one’s sense of self, often activates the Identity Factor. When this happens, people typically either procrastinate or revert to old behaviors protecting their familiar lifestyle at all costs for fear that their desired changes, when they finally do occur, will leave them feeling alienated, unsafe and confused.”

    I hope this is of some help to you. I found her 2 hour workshop very helpful and her book, which I’m still reading, is excellent.


  2. Stacy Clark Says:

    Kathleen! I nearly wrote you yesterday and here you are. I think there is a lot of truth in what you’re saying. I’ll take it to Inquiry & Quantum Wealth. I can definitely see some of these patterns in myself. My father has helped me financially, for example. Good words. Good timing. Thank you.

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