Archive for the ‘Jesus’ Category

Peace Now – Inner Peace Thoughts for 9/11

September 11, 2007


Just in case some of you want to know about this . . .

Please Pass It On to Others!

The Call is Thursday 9/13

Do you know Gay Hendricks? He’s written over 30 best-selling transformational books — books about relationships, breathing, manifestation, even golf!

Gay is are offering an upcoming teleclass that I’d like to invite you to attend at no charge.

Here’s Gay’s message about the class:

   When I was in Boulder recently, I had dinner with an old friend,    Steven Sashen. He’s one of the best “system thinkers” I know. If you want to know what REALLY makes something work, or how to make something more powerful or efficient, he’s your guy. He and I are teaming up on a new meditation course that will be offered via teleseminar.

   Steven is a longtime meditator. And when he turned his systems-thinking scope on meditation he discovered something that truly impressed me, a set of insights and practices that I wish I’d had 30 years ago. (Some of you know that I’m a longtime  meditator–in fact, I haven’t missed a day of meditation since 1973. So, anything that fine-tunes meditation is right up my alley.)

   If I’d had Steven’s insights and techniques, I think it would have accelerated my practice and my spiritual growth by years. He’s taken people who are new to meditation or who couldn’t make it work  for them – he’s even worked with teenagers and homeless people–and after just a few minutes of instruction, they’ve had experiences of peace, and deep spiritual insights that take most meditators decades to find.

   Steven’s techniques work well for advanced meditators, too. If you already have a meditation or spiritual practice, you can make an almost instant leap to a new depth and expansion.

   With Steven’s techniques you don’t need to stop (or even slow down) your thoughts and you don’t need to take time out from your busy schedule. You can do them practically anywhere.

   I could tell you more, it would be better for you to experience it yourself. So, I’ve arranged a way for you to do that.

       Go to
   When you get to the site, fill out the registration form and I’ll let you know about an upcoming free teleclass where you can discover for yourself how easily you can find deep body relaxation, greatly expanded awareness, and real inner-peace…even while the kids are demanding your attention or work is getting nuts.

   I hope you’ll join me for this new and exciting opportunity,

   Gay Hendricks

The teleclass is going to be really fun and interesting and there’s a chance to get a $400 gift. I hope you can make it, too.

presented by Garuda, Inc.

Have fun!


“It is no sign of mental health to be well-adjusted to an insane world.”

                 The Dalai Lama


Intuition and Sexiness Go Hand-In-Hand

July 11, 2007

Didn’t you know?


Maybe you were raised in the Puritan-influenced US.

Ah well. Had you been raised in the East, you might have a better clue, but then, maybe not.

Even the fundamentalists claim that God is all-knowing, all-seeing, all-hearing, which is to say: clairsentient, clairvoyant & clairaudient.

In other words, God is as intuitive as it gets.

So, when is a person intuitive?

When a person meditates, rests, immerses themselves in Who They Are, ie GOD… then, and only then are we intuitive.

We all do this all the time. It’s just that some of us notice it more and some of us trust this more.

Now . . . when is a person sexy?

Sex is the creative impulse. God is the Creator.

We are created in the image of a . . . Creator.

What does that make us?  Creators!

How do we do that? 

One way is SEX!

A person is sexy when they are . . .

Creative . . .

resting in the Energy that created them, open to being moved by God.

Musicians talk about how sometimes the music just plays itself.

Golfers… the shot just happened.

Runners – I wasn’t running. I was being run.

Meditators speak of being breathed.

Spirare is the Latin word for “to breathe.” God breathed the Spirit into us according to some mythologies.

These people have tapped into that place where they rest in God and are moved by the Spirit.

The whole “fall of man” myth is about how we try to seek that peace, intuition, and sexiness outside of ourselves, instead of inside where it always is.

That is why Jesus said, “Seek ye first the Kingdom of Heaven, and all else shall be added unto you.”

Meditate. Try it.

That peace, that intuition and yes!  that sexiness . . . all comes from relaxing into Spirit.

I’m looking for the man who knows all that and wants to share it with me and others, perhaps traveling, teaching and speaking to groups around the world. And, on the lighter side, wouldn’t it be cool if he had long hair and wore poet’s shirts?



Instant Advanced Meditation – Free Sample & Lifetime Guarantee

“It makes all the difference in the world to know that the One we seek seeks us with greater fervor than we can imagine. Because of that, our seeking must include a form of spiritual relaxation, a kind of staying put while being completely awake, so that God has no trouble finding us.”

                       – Jason Shulman
                         Kabbalistic Healing, pg 3

Friend’s Blogs

April 12, 2007

Hi y’all,

You know, I write blogs, but I only read a few of them.

My favorite is Steven Sashen’s Anti-Guru Blog. He only writes about once a month, but he is hilarious and true. He’s also the author of the IAM meditations.

He’s not against gurus. He says he’s against being one. I know what he means – he doesn’t want to be “followed,” but the man is an inspiring and very entertaining teacher.

Then there’s my friend, Ann O’Johnson. She has been blogging every day for a while. Used to be about 1-3 times a week. She’s working out some things in her own life that a lot of people can relate to.

And finally, I sporadically read Anachronista’s blog:

She’s into SCA (Society for Creative Anachronism), middle eastern dance and a lot of artsy craftsy stuff.

Oh, nearly forgot KC…

She’s studying to be a minister. We’ve known each other all our lives.

So, since I’m not writing so much right now, check out my friends.



All One

February 18, 2007

I saw a bumper sticker yesterday that I want. It said, “All One.”

Wouldn’t that be a beautiful world to work toward? No?

All One… that’s GOD, y’all!

Spider Robinson goes into this in most, if not all, of his books. Especially read “Time Pressure” if you have trouble with the idea of strangers knowing about you.

Today Becky, someone I used to be fairly close to, said one of the most wonderful things anyone has ever said to me or about me:

  “When I have a close relationship with you I have a relationship with everybody”

I love that and hope it is true. 

Yes, I took that out of context. She was complaining that I might say something about her to other friends of mine that she did not know. Her complete sentence was:

“When I have a close relationship with you I have a relationship with everybody – potentially people I don’t know, people with varying agendas or biases, varying
worldviews, etc.”

It’s true no matter where I put the period.  

I can’t find a problem with her or you or anyone else talking about me to others and thereby creating a relationship for me with someone I “don’t know.”

That one is a little tricky. In a way, I know everybody. So do you. They’re all you, or all me or whatever that is.

Sure, we’re not always aware of that place. We’re often in the black/white, right/wrong, you/me, us/them of this beautiful creative dual world. Okay. So?

I know that I have a really different take on these things than most people do. Frankly, it is one of my most precious gifts and something I cherish about myself. I can be sad sometimes when a former close friend like Becky chooses to distance herself (seem to distance herself) from me out of what looks like fear or separation or something. (I don’t really know. I’m not in her head, but that’s how it looks from what seems to be “out here.”)

I ran into this same thing with another friend. Well, he’s an ex-lover, but I’m not supposed to say that. No wait, I can say that part. It gets all confusing for me when I have to remember what I can and cannot say. I loved my ex-husband, Marvin, for completely agreeing with me about just sticking to the truth and not worrying about who we could say what to. That really worked for me. Totally.

Anyway, this lover’s name is Cricket. Well, that’s what I call him. Anyway, I’m about to go to some parties where he will know more people than I do. It’s a group he’s been hanging out with for a couple of years. One of my friends invited me, and I decided it was worth it for many reasons.

Remember the “Medieval Girl” blog?  It was right before this one.

This group has guys with long hair! I just have to go and see if I might have anything in common with them. Or the women, for that matter. Maybe people with similar interests. I’d love it if they do.

So, Cricket writes me and says, “my personal life is private.” I replied and said, “My personal life is public” and asked how he wants me to handle this. He says I can say we dated and that’s all anyone needs to know. Well, we actually lived together for nearly a year, so I’m going to go ahead and say that. I ran it by him. But I know the stuff he doesn’t want people to know.

It’s the stuff I’m blogging about all the time!

Sex, connection, relationships, etc.

What’s not to share about that?

Well, okay, I may not choose to share all of that with everyone all the time, but I share it with my friends and I do hope that by extension I am sharing it with all of their friends!  Good grief! This isn’t just anyone they would talk to about me! These are their friends!  

And so what if I don’t like all their friends? Or so what if they get me all wrong and don’t “understand” whatever that is? What harm does that do me?

If they really want to know, they can get to know me. If they don’t, okay.

So what if they publish it in tomorrow morning’s newspaper? And the whole world reads their opinion about me? People survive that all the time. Hell, they make good money off it!  

I can keep dealing with who and what is in front of me.

I somehow don’t feel threatened by it the same way Becky does.

What other people think of me is really none of my business.



Medieval Girl

February 12, 2007

Something inside me relaxed in gratitude and comfort yesterday at brunch when Steven turned to me and asked, “In what century do you think you should have been born?”

Isn’t it wonderful when your friends know things about you that are so integral that you miss the forest for the trees until someone says something? I got all warm and fuzzy inside.

I said, “I don’t know. Medieval times. What year was that?”

I checked Wikipedia. Pope Gregory started our calendar on February 24 in 1582. No wonder I didn’t know what year it was!  We didn’t use those years. Somebody was just about to change our whole concept of time!

Wikipedia also says that medieval times date from the 5th to the 16th century. I’m kinda part of the latter period there, I think. I didn’t read it all. That’s about the period of kings, queens, courts and . . . courtesans!!!

How’s that for a Valentine’s Day thought?

I love castles and the idea of dungeons and lots of things.

I love men with hair down to the middle of their backs and leather lace up boots and knives at their hips, wearing billowing poet’s shirts and speaking with British or Celtic accents. Pirate types, too. Think Johnny Depp in “Pirates of the Carribean.” And gypsies!

They melt me into a puddle.

I know a little more than just the romantic version. I know a little about living without plumbing and heating with a woodstove. Not much, but I lived a year at 9000 feet. After 3 nights at 18 degrees, I could keep the fire going all night. Necessity being a mother, and all of that.

I sometimes describe myself as a cross between a courtesan and a tavern wench. Courtesans were generally educated. If you have never seen the movie, “Dangerous Beauty,” I highly recommend it. If you’re female and love sex and giving men their fantasies, take your tissues, you will need them. “Princess Bride” is another one.

Turns out that the woman sitting next to me at brunch, someone who had not been there before, loves “Dangerous Beauty,” too. We made a date to have dinner and chat about our common interests.

Here is the Wikipedia entry on courtesans, with a note that “the neutrality of this article is disputed.”  Ha, I’ll bet.

“A courtesan of mid-16th century usage referred to a high-class prostitute or mistress, especially one associated with rich, powerful, or upper-class men who provided luxuries and status in exchange for her services. In Renaissance Europe, courtesans played an important role in upper-class society, sometimes taking the place of wives at social functions.[citation needed] As it was customary during this time for royal couples to lead separate lives—commonly marrying simply to preserve bloodlines and to secure political alliances—men would often seek sexual gratification and companionship from a courtesan. There have been a few isolated cases of courtesans providing services to wealthy females, however.[citation needed] Courtesans usually enjoyed more freedoms than was typical of women at the time. For example, they were financially stable and independent. Being in control of their own resources meant that they did not need to rely on their spouses or male relatives to survive, as was the case for the majority of women.”

So, the Medieval period is first, then there was the Renaissance, followed by the Protestant Reformation.

You lose me at the Renaissance. I am a little out of my depth and preferences by then. You get a little too intellectual and stiff there. That’s fine for those with 1500 different interests and talents, but that’s not me. And I prefer not to put Decartes before the horse.

The Protestant Reformation was sort of kind of a step forward, in my opinion, from straight Catholicism. At least people were starting to think for themselves a little more, but it is nothing compared to the ideas that Christ actually taught, as far as I can tell.

Christ taught us to “seek ye first the Kingdom of Heaven.” And then he told us where to look, “the Kingdom of Heaven is WITHIN.” Not in a book, not with a guru, not in a church, not in an organization… INSIDE.

Yeah, I have some affinity for that time, too. Mary Magdalene is my patron saint. She is indeed a saint in the Episcopal church.

I really love the castles. Can I have mine with heat and running water?

This prompts many people to ask if I am a member of SCA, the Society for Creative Anachronism. The answer is “no.” Oh, I might fit in with one group or another. I’ve gone to an event or two. I’d love to learn the dances. But for some reason it isn’t quite the fit I’m after. I don’t want to play at it, dress up in period garb and go to SCA events, really. Oh, I might with the right person.

And yes, I’ve been to a few Renaissance Festivals in a couple of states. (No pun intended.) They’re alright. I’m not a fan of large groups of people I do not know doing a multitude of different colorful things. (This aversion keeps me from Burning Man, too, since that’s often another question I am asked. That and the desert and the heat. No thanks!)

One of my favorite albums as a child was Oscar Brand’s “Bawdy Songs and Backroom Ballads, Volume III.” I had it memorized by the time I was 13 or 14.

Try this one:

She’ll Do It Again  

And for a sheep-skin, she’ll do it, she’ll do it,
And for a sheep-skin, she’ll do it again,
And for a cow’s horn, she’ll do it all morn,
And merrily turn, and do it again.

Among our young lasses is Muirland Meg,
She’ll beg you to do it she’ll beg and she’ll beg,
At thirteen her maidenhead flew to the gate,
And thedoor of thecage it is wide open yet

Her kettle-black eyes want to tickle you through,
Her lips seem to say it, “Kiss me, please do,”
The curls and the links of her bonny black hair
Would put you in mind that the lassie has mair.

An armful of love is her bosom sae plump,
A span of delight is her middle and rump,
A taper white leg, and a stomach in style,
And a fiddle nearby you can play for a while.

For love’s her delight, and kissing’s her treasure,
She’ll stick at no price and she’ll give you good measure,
So take her warm hand, mon, or better, her leg,
And sing of the praises of Muirland Meg.

 Here are the lyrics to one of my favorites, “Kafoozalem.” The tune is “London Bridge,” basically. I found 2 spellings and several versions worse, or better, depending upon your taste, than this one, but this is the one I learned as a child.

You can find the rest of them on this link:


Hi ho Kafoozalem, the harlot of Jerusalem
Prostitute of ill repute
Daughter of the Baba.

Come listen to my tale of woe
It happened many years ago
When women rarely answered no
Way down in old Jerusalem.


Kafoozalem was a wily witch
A horny whore, a brazen bitch
She caused all the lips to twitch
That liveth in Jerusalem.


There was a prince both lean and tall
Whose manly arts made all to fall
His victims lined the Wailing Wall
That standeth in Jerusalem.


One night returnin’ from a spree
His customary leer had he
Looked down the road and chanced to see
That horny wench Kafoozalem.


With artful eye and cunning look
She led him to a shady nook
And to her bounteous bosom took
The pride of all Jerusalem.


But he was too abrupt, alas
And so he made a hasty pass
That knocked Kafoozalem to the grass
That grows in old Jerusalem.


But Kafoozalem was overgassed
She arched her back and loosed a blast
That sent him flying far and fast
Sailin’ o’er Jerusalem.


And when the moon is bright and red
A flying form sails overhead
Still raining curses on the bed
Of that brazen bitch Kafoozalem.


I also loved “Dynamo Hum,” by Frank Zappa, and dozens of others similar to these. 

That may be another blog, for another day.

Goodnight, boys and girls. 


Stacy (aka Anastacia)


January 22, 2007

So, I read Craig’s List personals ads. Why? Intermittent reinforcement, the strongest kind there is. If you don’t think so, think about how gambling works or read the research.

At the same time, I’m no slave to things that don’t work… when I notice it. CL has brought me some really fine friends to talk to, some of the highest spiritual experiences I’ve ever had with another human being whom I knew shared the space, and a lot of good conversations in with the admittedly time-wasting drek.

Today a man, likely a doctor or something since he mentions his pager calling him to the ER, today a man wrote about passion and invited women to reply to him. He wants to know about passion. I wrote him, yes. Frankly, I doubt that he’s really my type, but he lit a fire under my fingers, and I told him so. A reply to him was just that, and meant for an audience of one, but I think that I’d like to write about passion here… as if I ever really write about anything else.

I wrote to this point and paused. Now I’m back.

I sat here and categorized this blog (see below). While I did that, I wondered how to say what I am passionate about. This is kind of a forest-for-the-trees question to me. I am passionate about so much. If you knew me, you’d agree. I jump in with both feet so often. Yes, I’ve felt a bit beaten down these past couple or three years, yes, but my passion did not die. It rekindles itself from within.

I am wondering what I am “most” passionate about. I’d have to say mystical spirituality, direct experience of God, finding and following my Guidance, and sharing that with others.

Everything I do is oriented that direction.

I read books for spiritual inspiration and messages, so I don’t mind when Tom Robbins or Robert A. Heinlein or Spider Robinson pontificate a bit in their books. I love it. I watch movies for the same reason, so I am picky. I won’t sit still for just any movie. Contact, Dangerous Beauty (OMG), Sister Act, Dead Poet’s Society, Bliss, Mona Lisa Smile, Rocky Horror Picture Show, Secretary, Matrix, Harry Potter, Princess Bride . . .  get the idea?

I write passionately. Read my blogs and see if you agree or not.

I sing. That is all about passion! I chant kirtans and bhajans with my back arched and my hands up. I can bounce on a bed to ZZ Top. I like to drive fast with Jethro Tull’s Thick as a Brick blaring. I’ve got to get back to my voice lessons. That really made a difference. sigh

My favorite music and musicians are pretty passionate: Jethro Tull, Moody Blues, Beatles, Satriani, Leonard Cohen, Impossible Objects, Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young, Dylan. Closer by 9 Inch Nails. That one about the Discovery channel. I may add to this list later.

Sex is my passion, too. People. Men. Women. How the hell do you do sex without passion? Oh, okay, there’s sensuous, soft, cuddly, warm, but that just an ember glow of passion – different from the full fire, and still passion.

If you speak astrology, you can find passion all over my natal chart. I have at least 7 planets and a bunch of asteroids in Sagittarius and Leo. Venus in Scorpio in the 8th house. Nothing more passionate than that! Ask anyone.

I am passionate about Truth.

That is a whole discussion in itself. Keeps cropping up. I’ll have to see if I’ve blogged on it directly yet or not.

My name is Anastacia and it means “resurrection.” That, as the Craig’s List gentleman observed, means the passion of Christ, the passion of Buddha, and more. I doubt anything less than passion would start a religion. Sure, Buddha seems like more of a quiet passion in full bloom, but how did he get there? Read Siddhartha by Herman Hesse if you do not know. He pursued Truth with passion. Mohammed? Now there is some passion, y’all. And how much passion do you have to have to pray 5 times a day? Goodness!

I told this CL fellow he lit a fire under my fingers. I think I’ll stop typing about passion now and feel some in other ways.



Sagittarius Gone Awry

January 12, 2007

Good evening,

I rarely blog in the evening, being the Morning Person ™ that I am, but for some reason, I have decided to share Eric Francis’ latest entries here on my blog. He is permanently linked over there on the right, twice, if I’m not mistaken. This is his latest post to his subscribers, and I am fortunate to count myself among them.

Here is the link:

First, I don’t usually feel qualified to comment on the political scenario. At the same time, I do feel I have a citizen’s responsibility to keep up somewhat. That’s why I read Eric’s work. He’s about the only political news I can stomach. I was raised in the “don’t vote – it only encourages them” era., which I stumbled out of by registering to vote in order to write in Hunter S. Thompson for my girlfriend back in 1984. Funny way to come to voting, but I’ve voted every major election since, I think.

Sagittarius energy is most emphatically is something I feel qualified to talk about. My own chart has a Sagittarius Stellium (means several planets in one sign). That stellium occurs in the 9th house, which is ruled by Sagittarius, and that gives it even more of a Sagittarian nature. Furthermore, all this Pluto conjunct the Galactic Core energy that defines this year, and has not been seen by any living human before, about which every astrologer is all atwitter, happens to be within half a degree of my own Sun and conjunct my Midheaven.

Sorry, if all that is too much astrological shorthand. This is not an astrology column. It is, however, very Sagittarian and very Galactic Core. Why? Because I am.

So Sagittarius gone awry is about enthusiastic devotion to dogma and being right. It’s everything we hate about fundamentalist Christianity and evangelism. It’s being seriously activated by Mars conjunct Pluto.

How do I know this? Ask anyone who knows me about my shadow side and nearly all of them will say something about how certain I am of truth and things like right and wrong. It annoys people. Whilst I’m pretty certain I’ve got a pretty dang good handle on truth, it upsets my mother and certain others no end because it isn’t the way they see things. I try not to let them ruffle my feathers or get my goat.

It’s actually worse to stymie me on these things. My own mother has yet to learn not to distract me with a myriad of possibilities, even though she knows the astrological correlations in her daughter.

What is the most common caution given a Sagittarian?

“Don’t scatter your arrows,”they tell us. “Pick a direction and aim at a target.” Sagittarius is the Archer, the Centaur.

So, really, for us, it’s better to head off, hell bent for leather in the wrong direction (think Dudley Doowright) than not to be going anywhere at all. An object in motion can be guided. An object at rest has to overcome inertia, especially a Sagittarian at rest! Therefore, I am rarely at rest, except for intentional meditation periods twice a day and longer on Sundays.

But I really wish these politicians would give it a rest!

One of these days I’m going to go on and order a custom t-shirt (forest green, white lettering, some kind of script, short sleeved, fitted) with that wonderful slogan from the 60’s:

“Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.”

All the GC astrologers I’ve been reading, say that because all this astrological activity is close to the heart of our galaxy, the source of our worlds, and symbolically, the Source of Everything, there is a strong chance for a spiritual outcome to all these disturbing events Eric is writing about (I hope you read the link.) Most definitely.

If they are right, even these atrocious wrongs can be – well, righted – if we just keep moving, keep our eyes open, center ourselves, ask inside what is right action. Take that action. Stay alert to subtle guidance.

Write it down! when it arrives.

Galactic Core insights are said to be kind of use it or lose it things. If they are not noted, they slip through our grasp like a faintly remembered dream.

I had a sense of that the other morning. I had a very clear sense of a school, very peaceful, energetically clear. I felt at home there. I will know it when I see it or build it or whatever is next.

What insights are you getting? Are you writing them down? Please do.

The clearer Sagittarius energy is all about deeper truths, education and travel. It’s about saying our piece and aiming ourselves in a true direction. Mars correlates with action. Pluto with the unearthing of deep psychological material, sexuality, things hidden, with death and . . . yes, rebirth.

My name is Anastacia and it means “resurrection.” Let’s aim for that, ok?



The Secret – Not!

December 18, 2006

A colleague & friend in London just sent me a well-put opinion on “The Secret, ” a popular recent, “you create your own reality” New Age movie, from someone named Burt Harding, I’m also A Course in Miracles student, not to mention The Work of Byron Katie, and my understanding of Truth has developed a lot in the past few years with that.

Here’s an excerpt from his newsletter:

“In our fascination with seeking we are ready to buy into anything that promises personal power, longer life and a happier and healthier future. But is this really what it’s all about? The path of working with manifesting things in your life can be called the path of magic (coined by A Course in Miracles).

This path of magic is our ego’s craving and blocks our immediate seeing of what-is here and now. One of the great illusions is that we can find happiness through attachments and material attainments.”

Isn’t anybody else noticing this?

I sent this note to a couple of my email lists.

I received many, many well thought out replies to this post and I appreciate them all. I was surprised at the depth of this discussion.

Thank you. I wish everyone had pressed “reply to all” so you could have seen them.

 What I have found so far is that reality is sort of like the Serenity Prayer:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.  Courage to change the things I can and the Wisdom to know the difference.

 A better interpretation was offered by Steven Sashen, author of the upcoming book on quantum wealth. He pointed out that in the yin yang  symbol, one side represents the areas in which we can take action and do our part to move toward whatever we are moving toward as a goal.

The other side, though, is the things we cannot control, and we would not  want to! That’s where the Mystery happens. There “the Universe does what  the Universe does.” Or, “This or something better, Thy Will be done.”

Our job is to stay on our side of that line.

 (Steven actually used the word “magic,” but in order not to confuse it  with “magical thinking” or attempts to control reality, things outside of  our control, I’m saying Mystery and the Universe.)

One of the things that helps me stay on my side of that wavy line down the  middle of the yin yang is to ask Byron Katie’s questions, especially:

       “Whose business am I in when I think that thought?”

We’ve found three kinds of business:

God’s (use your preferred term) – the weather, the stock market, events, other people
Someone Else’s – their opinions, thoughts, feelings, actions, etc.
Mine – well, check inside, yours may differ

It was Kathy Adams who, about this time last year, really helped me to focus on this idea more, when she told me that she had been checking and finding out that almost nothing was her business. I’m discovering that, too.

Peace seems to be the result.

Peace on Earth, Good Will toward All,



No Local Vertical

November 16, 2006

Thanks to Spider Robinson where I first read this concept, and then belatedly (and posthumously) to the immortal Robert A. Heinlein and his Waldo & Magic, Inc.

“Oh Great Wave, wipe away, wipe away my false face.
Awaken from my sleep the Radiant Light.
Touch me! Touch me! I am once again beyond the beyond.
I am that I am.”

sung by Scott Medina

At the end of the Quantum Wealth workshop (, Steven told how he met a monk who could do that harmonic toning thing with his voice. He asked how they learned that. The monk said that they tone and the student listens. Then the student tries. And on like that until one day the student does it. Apparently, it takes a long time. Steven just said, “Oh.” A couple of days later, he did it. He called the monk, did the tone, and the monk said, “Oh, that is very good.”

He told us we had received the transmission.

I am not sure how many times I’ve taken this workshop, and I imagine I may do it again. It’s a great time. At the same time, I’ve received the transmission. Going to the workshop again or calling Steven up today could be one of my favorite ways to recreate the familiar sense of “me” that I was not recreating so much during the weekend.

Pondering this, I have not gone for a mocha, not left the house, not called Steven, not had breakfast. I did finally eat 2 pieces of chocolate and half a cup of the chocolate-laced Bolder Breakfast Tea. Yum.

While I waited for the tea water to boil, I made a to-do list. I had to laugh. Apparently, I had a few next steps, none of which were chocolate, Steven or mocha. I’m still leaning toward the mocha. Phooey. Because I know if I ingest caffeine, next I’ll crave salt. Sigh One thing at a time.

I put on Scott Medina’s chant CD, too. At first the words seemed to be getting in the way of me-being-with me, another of those things I tend to run from. We all do, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to stay with myself. I let it play while I took a hot bath. Even the bath was pulling me out of myself this morning. When they CD got to “Oh Great Wave” I dropped in. deep breath

Calling people is another way I recreate that familiar sense of “me.”

Yesterday I resisted one of those for hours. Hours and hours. Finally, around 2 pm, I just let go into it and decided I wasn’t going anywhere or calling anyone. I was just going to sit there and be with me. Guess what? Someone called. Funny how these things work.

So, why did I call this blog “No Local Vertical?”

Because it is my sense of things that Spider Robinson uses the idea of no local vertical as a metaphor for not recreating that familiar sense of “me.” Maybe he does. Maybe he doesn’t. But intentional or not, it works anyway, reading his Star Dance trilogy (which I highly recommend to your attention!)

In Star Dance the author talks about how few people can live without a sense of local vertical. You try it. I cannot imagine living in free fall. I can’t even ride a bus without getting seasick! I don’t know what I’d do if suddenly there was no up or down, no floor, no ceiling… and no walls!!!

Yeah, no walls. Between me and me.

And by extension, between me and you.

When those walls drop and I drop in, I think I have a taste of what Spider calls “no local vertical.” I don’t know which way is up. I’m free floating . . . but without the anxiety.

I met a friend for brunch one Sunday morning in that state. I looked into his eyes and for a split moment I couldn’t tell who was who. I drew away from the intimacy of it. My walls went blammo! Back to that familiar sense of self.

And yet I spend a lot of time and money seeking these experiences. Up until 1985 I did it with drugs. Pot, acid, ecstacy, mushrooms … oh mushrooms. Put a few chemicals in my body and the walls came down. But the anxiety stayed. In fact, if memory serves (that was over 20 years ago), if memory serves, the anxiety went up not down.

Now, when I . . . hmm, meet myself, so to speak, without the chemicals, the anxiety is usually absent. When it comes back, boom… there I go, off in search of any of those famous ways to find the familiar local vertical, the familiar sense of “me.” Which, by the way, is contracted and tight and scared and none of those things I know in my heart of hearts that I’d rather be: expansive and relaxed and alive and aware.

Somehow this weekend I got an even deeper sense of the “looking forward to” that Byron Katie uses in the Turn Around for Question #6. (If you don’t know what that is, look it up on or keep reading.

Question #6 is “What is it you never want to experience with that person again?”

Right now, I might say that I never want to experience anxiety or running from presence with myself or using coffee, chocolate, phone calls and emails to recreate that familiar sense of “me.”

Is that true? Check. No, I get a contraction in my solar plexus.

Can I absolutely know that that’s true? Nope. Very tight. Clearly I’m lying to myself.

How do I react when I believe that thought or story or . . . lie? Make a list.

Oh Jesus.

I eat chocolate. I crave mocha. I crave teriyaki chicken. I call people. I email people. I take workshops. I read books. I turn on music to drown out my thoughts. I stress. I think poorly of myself. I think poorly of others. I have long arguments in my mind with myself and others. I obsess. I have sex. I run from myself.

Who would you be without that thought or story or lie?

High as a kite. Expansive. Relaxed. Open. Clear. Available. Unafraid. Peaceful.

(“Is that all?” we ask with a smile.)

Turn it Around (to self, other or opposite)

I am willing to experience anxiety or running from presence with myself or using coffee, chocolate, phone calls and emails to recreate that familiar sense of “me.”

Is that thought at least as true? (as the lie . . . lol)

Yes. Definitely. Why not? It hasn’t killed me yet! I actually enjoy some of those things sometimes.

Can you find another turn around?


I look forward to experiencing anxiety or running from presence with myself or using coffee chocolate, phone calls and emails to recreate that familiar sense of “me.”

Is that thought at least as true?

God, yes. Doing that shows me the next step to take, gives me gifts of expanded clarity beyond the beyond. I am that I am.

“Oh Great Wave, wipe away, wipe away my false face.
Awaken from my sleep the Radiant Light.
Touch me! Touch me! I am once again beyond the beyond.
I am that I am.”

sung by Scott Medina . . . and me!

Truth or Lie? Can You Tell? Yes, You Can.

October 12, 2006

Back in the 80’s I discovered what I then called my “yes/no feeling.” For 20 years, I used it as a primary intuition and decision making guide.

About 6 years ago, my friend Steven Sashen showed me a new framework for it and a way to go beyond this seeming duality to a place that I call “spontaneous right action.” That is, action that is not a reaction. Not moving away. Not moving toward. Just moving as an expression of who I am.

So, if you want to find your own feeling of truth/lie, try this:

Can you remember a time when you lied to someone you loved? (We all can.)

What does it feel like in your body as you remember that? Usually somewhere between your chin and your tailbone. Most people find feelings in their torso.

Great. I usually insist people find their own feelings, but this a blog and I’m not there, so way down at the bottom of this post, I’m going to tell you what you’re *likely* to find. (NOTE 1)

Now, float any statement through your mind. Anything. Try one of your favorite negative beliefs about yourself. “I’m not good enough.” and stuff like that.

Notice how you feel. Is it in any way similar to the feeling of lying to someone you love? Highly likely that it is. Maybe in a slightly different place, maybe stronger, weaker, something, but it is likely to have the same “flavor.”

Know why?

You’re lying to someone you love… YOU.

Don’t believe me on these things. Test it with all kinds of thoughts.

And yes, there is a truth feeling. See NOTE 2 below the signature.

Run anything you believe past this.

It’s internal kinesiology, aka “muscle testing.” You’ve probably heard of and/or seen this. If not, I can tell you about that, too. Your muscles go weak in the presence of a lie or something that isn’t good for you, strong in the presence of the truth and things that are good for you. With another person, you hold out your arm and it’s either strong or weak. Testing for yourself is generally done by trying to pry apart your own fingers (with the opposite hand) held in an “OK” sign.

I like the internal version better. Less obvious to others, very clear to me.


You’re welcome to call me or get together sometime if these written suggestions aren’t enough or you’re confused or even if you’re just interested.

Also, The Work of Byron Katie is, because it is based on our own internal knowing of what’s true, much truer to me and gets me very connected and awake. Katie is awake. So are many of her students that I have met.

Awake and true are 2 different things.

Many people are awake, far more than we realize. Many of the theories and explanations of it all that come through many of these people’s personalities may or may not be true.

So. There it is.


NOTE 1: Most likely you will find some kind of contraction, tension, tightness or heaviness.

NOTE 2: It’s open, expansive, light and relaxed. Sometimes there are “truth tears,” involuntary tears. Not quite crying, just tears. Sometimes chills, tingles.